Wednesday, February 01, 2017

Film: Skyscraper @ Crap Film Club


Looking for something to do and as a fan of "bad cinema" seeing an event being organised with the name "Crap Film Club" made it an no-brainer, which best describes this film.

This is a Die Hard remake featuring the incredibly inflated Anna Nicole Smith playing the part of a helicopter chauffeur who finds herself on the roof of the building that is being overrun with terrorists who have got their hands on a microchip that can do something with satellites that will result in the end of the world (they don't really explain how).

These were my observations.

It looks like they didn't have much time to film the helicopter sequences resulting in the same clips being used over and over.

The helicopter control looks like a Quickshot 2 joystick.

The bad guys look like the Chippendales with one trying to be the Terminator and another looks like a lion and seems to worry about his conditioned hair too much. Few of them speak English as a first language.

The leader of the bad guys quotes Shakespeare but uses "Ciao Bella" as his pay-off line.

One of the bad guys falls from the skyscraper. No expense is spared as the sequence is shot from the view of a witness watching the man falling as in his head just moves from looking up to looking down.

The sex scenes are really bad, with the second one at a picnic taking place in flashback as Anna Nicole Smith takes some brief respite from escaping from the bad guys.

The bad guys have worse aim than Stormtroopers

There's a young boy who rides a scooter a la The Shining who finds himself caught up in the terrorist takeover. The worst "bring your kids to work day" ever.

There's a guy who looks like he's come from the Police Academy films.

The film is incredibly entertaining and totally in the so bad it's good camp. Well done to the promoters of the event for choosing such a great film. I'll definitely be back.

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